man-made scars

[machinery]

outside
the
content watercolor sky
sits like a top hat to mother's evening
skin.

green blades shiny from back stoop lights,
ground still saturated from end of the weekend rain; she's wetting her lips.

across the parking lot, tree buds skip
like just born popcorn, prancing with their brothers and sisters, a white fantastic parade landing then rising continuously in sequence.

like resonances of rain upon her soft belly,
the just born beat their essence against the blacktop, being manipulated by a cool summer night wind.

mother earth is blooming, permitting her first childern to frolic across her skin, tickling her mad-made scars, accompanying my feet towards home.

<font color="#a62a2a" size="1">[ May 06, 2003 02:54 AM: Message edited by: machinery ]</font>

[SHATOUSHKA]

yummy [img]graemlins/thumbs_up.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

[machinery]

thanks. i'm currently writing a paper on wallace steven's "thirteen ways of looking at a blackbird" and i just became inspired.

is there anything pushed in this; any words that don't fit?

is the message made significant?

[SHATOUSHKA]

that rhymes.... [img]tongue.gif[/img]

well.. i did kinda think using the term 'just
born' twice was a little bit redundant...
i liked the term 'just born popcorn'... but think
the second 'just born' could have been different.

i did get a metaphor... but i found the action/movement
in this really exciting. i could feel the wind.

[Hannibal]

I really like it... *nods*
I agree with shatzy, i could feel the wind...
Makes me wanna have sex with ole mother earth, and get her to relax [img]wink.gif[/img]